Now came the time for questions. A member of the press who had been asked to plug the museum that was the setting for the Q&A session asked, “How did you like the abstract art of the surrealist master Salvador Dali, Senator?”
Taken off guard, the candidate replied, “I enjoyed it. Even though I think, frankly, sir, reality sucks—“
The press immediately erupted. The loudest voices asked, “Don’t you mean ‘surrealism,’ Senator?” and “Isn’t that a little harsh toward the gay artist, as you and your supporters have been toward all gays?”
Being a candidate of very little brain, the Senator was not certain of the difference between former and latter. As such, he replied, “As for the latter question, I hate homophones. For the other—“
Another eruption as the loudest voices asked, “But Senator, don’t the homophobes you now claim to ‘hate’ make up the majority of your supporters?” and “Surely you know our President needs a firm grasp of the English language, don’t you, Senator?”
“I didn't say I hate homophobes; I never said I hate anybody! And a little order to these questions would be appreciated. Let’s keep this party straight.”
Another eruption. “Sir, do you mean that your party turns away gays and homophobes at the same time? Exactly who is your target audience?”
It was the stress of the press, not the weather nor his cold, that caused the candidate to collapse at the podium.
It was no surprise to anyone that the incumbent President won the election by a landslide.